Facing divorce: crisis or chance for a fresh start

Facing divorce: crisis or chance for a fresh start

Get divorced or remain with your spouse

Your relationship is in tatters. You are running yourself ragged, trying to mend what remains but also wondering if the effort is worthwhile or if it ever was. You separate. You divorce. Your rights and responsibilities are “reorganized.” You are faced with legal and financial complexities. How much alimony will you have to pay or will you get? What assets will you keep? Where will your kids live? When will they visit you?

Repeal of the 45-rule

Housewives/husbands beware: The golden days are over if you’re getting divorced in Switzerland. The 45-rule has been lifted. Can you imagine working, entering the labor force, and pursuing professional opportunities? What may prevent you from doing so? When is gainful employment possible and reasonable? How is the income determined? – Or do you prefer to stay married and provided for after all?


You are afraid of divorce as it involves change. It is a plunge into the uncertain. Your world is crumbling. It is embarrassing to tell your friends and co-workers. You are faced with practical challenges. You do the housework, clean, iron, go grocery shopping, prepare your own meal, and attend parties alone. Something even more disruptive and confusing is the fact that you are forced to single mutual friends out.

Having mixed feelings
The experience is bewildering. In the beginning, you are in a state of denial, eyes shut to the unpleasantness before you. You become angry, perhaps hateful – yet distressed because of the remorse and self-doubt that linger. The turmoil renders you numb and detached. Temporarily. Panic and despair fill the void, giving way to a deep, enduring sense of grief. Your only path forward is to redefine yourself, your goals, and your life.

Every man is the architect of his own fortune
The journey begins with some harsh, but sobering lessons. Your partner is not responsible for the broken marriage. Well, maybe he or she is, but reproach only escalates the conflict.

Shape your future

Reflect about what you need to shape a positive and productive future. Who should be involved? Tackle it. Step by step.

If children are involved, there will be segregations. The legal relationship between both parents and child will continue, but how you will pull that off in practice is what will shape your children’s future and as well as yours. Thus, everyday life must be reorganized. Find the best solution possible.

As agonizing as the divorce process can be, it is also a reincarnation. You clean up and begin anew! Consider what you need to redefine your future, a bright future with new opportunities.

Do you need someone to assist you on this journey? I can help. Call me.